Groucho Marx

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

I intend to live forever, or die trying.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

 One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.